Proximity and Familiarity
You're most likely to be attracted to people you see frequently. This isn't just convenience — repeated exposure increases liking through a well-documented phenomenon called the mere exposure effect. The person you keep running into becomes more attractive over time.
Similarity Attracts
Despite the 'opposites attract' myth, research overwhelmingly shows that similarity predicts attraction. Similar values, similar socioeconomic background, similar personality traits, even similar facial features — we're drawn to reflections of ourselves.
The Role of Mystery
Initial attraction often involves uncertainty — does this person like me? That uncertainty triggers dopamine, the same neurotransmitter involved in gambling and anticipation. Once certainty is established, the chemical cocktail shifts from excitement to attachment.
Knowing Your Pattern
Everyone has an attraction pattern — a template of traits that triggers interest. Understanding your pattern helps you distinguish between genuine compatibility and chemical attraction to someone who's wrong for you.